Friday, March 03, 2006

Disgusted


friday night, 1123pm . about a year and a half ago . around this time in Kuching, i would be drinking some where with my friends talking crap n still checking out girls as usual, but due to the life i have now . im living a life of a 60yr old maybe . i dun hit the clubs since nov05 , never smoke, never drink, never dance, i dunno wat else i dun do anymore . for someone so active like me, to totally die down . im disgusted when i look at my hair, my face even, my skin, my weight, my arm especially . cant play ball, cant snowboard (no money for that anyways) . im disgusted when i look at my car . im disgusted lookin at my clothes too, which havent been updated like for mths? evendoh if i get new clothes, i wouldnt have d chance to wear em, during weekends? i would just rot at home . financially disgusted, totally flat, education, none, qualifications, zero . decision making, really really bad . what have i done to myself? i think i need a breather ..

6 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

everything will be fine dun worry

11:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

it takes time to heal. Don't get frustrated,ok?
i know i'm not a good gf by taking care of you when you are in blue but making you sad. BUT, i promise, i'll never let you down. sorry, baby. i know i'm always good at telling you "don't this" and "don't that" but never really do anything for helping you out. this time, i'm gonna tell myself 15 thousand times not to hurt you no matter what's happened.
I miss your smiles, indeed.

1:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Worrying will make u have white hair. But the problems r still there. If you don't worry, the problems are still there. But no white hair and no wrinkes.
Smile, let things take their course and go with the flow.
I know its easy for me to say cos Im not going thru it, all talk. But everyone goes thru different problems. Take care ~

1:36 AM  
Blogger こうゆうけん said...

Its good to not smoke or drinks often! Disgusted about yourself? I thought you said you are looking forward and live what you want there! How come so many complains suddenly? Well, it takes times to solve it... don't worry too much! Plan it out! Anyway, I had changed my web address!

4:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey u r not alone. I haven't been clubbing after Halloween! Totally invisible. Becoz I had enuff, and I was broke. But I'll be alive again this summer. Been working hard and saving some money. U do the same OK?! N take good care of yr arm for all the good activities waiting for us this summer 2006!

10:38 AM  
Blogger blabla said...

our lifestyle is not about how much we earn, what we own, or where we travel and reside. It’s how we relate to people and how willing we are to share all we have with them. Don’t get too attached to temporary pleasure, understand the purposes you are doing it by asking yourself “what for?”
a showy life is an empty life; a plain and simple life is a full life.

11:56 AM  

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