Sunday, March 05, 2006


ever been in a whirlpool? LA's the best place to feel that . the energy is so high, n ull feel lost inside it . theres so many ppl around u n yet they are all just strangers . have u ever been to the clubs in KL? dont u feel that d ppl are just so fake n lonely in the big city . imagine a place mayb hundred of times bigger . the life in the big city . the ppl around me, those ppl i saw with my own eyes, housemates, skoolmates, colleagues, friends etc . u cant feel the warmth n heart of anyone . u see ppl leaving just like that . try standing in the middle of d city . ull see ppl walkin pass u n just walkin on by without even noticing ur there at all ppl smile during d weekends n talk and ask how are u doing, n u noe they just ask n talk to u just for the sake of asking, the sincerity is totally not there, u wont feel that u belong anywhere or to any group of ppl, ur just drifting n hanging in there .thats the exact feeling i have .. since iv been here more than a year and 3mths already . ppl just come n leave california just like that, even malaysians . everyone is just walkin to their own place . kuching, a place so small n nth to do during the weekends . but u feel the sense of belonging, n when i look behind me . or even if i dont, ill know that there are ppl behind me that will stand rite behind me . n yet here, when i look behind i dun have anyone here, not a single person, mayb my girl n my mum,n mayb steven n thats it . d rest? are all like strangers just passing by . thats why when friday is coming, i dun even have d hype or energy at all, cz the city has drown it all . i was having dinner with a friend just now . we were talkin abt this, n he said his adapted to the lifestyle, he said he still can b friends or can consider friends that he meet all over, till now . all the ppl i met now .. are just strangers walkin on by ..


Blogger こうゆうけん said...

OMG... don't treat me as stranger! I'm your friend man! :(

11:34 PM  
Blogger Ling said...

oh no! the symptoms are showing.. i'm regret to annouce that somebody is homesick..

i know u might be getting tired of hearing me say, "well, thats how i felt when i first got here." but it's true except that my city ain't HUGE.. my 1st few yrs were never ending nitemares... haf patience my friend... soon u'll meet ur kind of friends.. i myself only met my hang out buddies last year..which wuz lyk..... my 5th year in nz? haha.. call me anti social.. XD ooh well... there's a saying..good friends are hard to find .. indeed it is.. stay strong & happy =)

12:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You got a friend who is watching u from the far but hesitate to be an active friend.

Kuching was great but it is 'was'. If you go back in a year or 2, you'll probably be disappointed coz everything has been changed. Been there, done that.

So treat ppl the way you want to be treated, and you'll make friends out of bunch of strangers.

10:16 AM  
Blogger Aliciaks said...

No place is better than home but we have to move on n see the world to be sucessful....

Be somebody n come back as somebody to contribute to our own home.

No point missing home and just comeback even before u exceeded anything.


P/S : there's always a way to find true friends.. & if u don't, u r not trying hard enuff.

9:41 PM  
Anonymous JmeJmeJmeJme said...

When you look behind u for support, you are looking too far beyond! Look closer and you will find that there are many, not just one who are there for u.
U may not be a Christian but my favorite poem has some relevance :

Or read my blog about the "footsteps in the sand"

4:41 AM  
Anonymous baselnator said...

Hmmmmm, if u miss home(kuching), come back! Sometimes u just hafta listen to ur heart, whatever others tell u, that doesnt matter, when it comes to the end it's still u urself who's gonna face the problem. I know... you are a person who's not good in giving up ur dream as going to a place like LA had always been ur dream, then u just hafta fight like warrior, overcome ur problems.

10:08 AM  
Blogger audrey said...

that's big city life i guess. people come and go, only a few will leaved their footprints in our heart. it's part of growing up too, when you're picky about who you mix with, when you do not bother to please anyone just to for the sake getting to know them.

if you ever come back to kuching again, i reckon things will never be the same either. just make the most out of whatever you have presently, forget the past and look forward to great future that lies ahead.

8:56 AM  
Anonymous saran said...

you're just feeling homesick,it'll take quite awhile to get used to life there...big cities don't mean that people don't care...if you knew people there your whole life you would feel loved. but you're in a whole new and big's completely different.
cheer up! :) and God bless you!

5:45 AM  
Blogger Veron said...

define your "stranger" Marv. People who moved in and out of your life without any trace to follow up? Or those who don't show up in front of you, mentally? If you need friends, be a friend firstly; if you want to be loved and cared, learn to spread the love firstly. It takes time, and of course self-sacrifice. Either you are willing to or not.
I sincerely declare that "you ain’t a stranger but a friend of mine!"

12:01 PM  

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